Jurgen Klinsmann’s words to Team USA

*Klinsmann* MEN, I ZSTAND BEFORE YOUZ 

AS ZEE COACH OF ZEE AMERICAN NATIONAL TEAM

I COMMAND YOU TO DEFEAT PORTUGAL &

ZEE EVIL EMPEROR ZURG [coughs] CRISTIANO RONALDO

AND WHEN WE MEET “DIE NATIONALMANNSCHAFT”

*Dempsey* Who the fuck are you talking about dude?

ZEE GERMANS YOU MOTHERFUCKIN GODDAMN ZSON OF A ZSLOPPY ZSECOND BITCH!!

BROOKS, JONES, JOHNSON AND WHOEVER HASZ GODDAMN GERMAN BLOOD

WIR MÜSSEN DIE VATER VERZICHTEN!!

HAGEL DIE VEREINIGTEN STAATEN VON AMERIKA!!

*Confused faces inside the dressing room*

GODDAMNIT YOU RETARDED YANK MORONSZ!

GO THE MOTHERFUCKING TEAM USZ OF GODDAMN A!!

MAY GOD BLESS ME FOR MY EXZCESSIVE ZSWEARING &

MAY THE ZSTATURE OF ZSWEET MARY LIBERTY 

HELP US BEAT PORTUGAL & ZEE FATHERLAND!!!

 

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